I didn't cry.

It was raining, and I was sleepy, and I kissed my grandparents goodbye and got into Beatrice. I pulled my traveling hat snugly around my ears and stared at the rain through the windshield. The inside car was quiet, and all I could hear was the muffled sound of the rain. I curled my hands around the steering wheel.

In the house, my grandfather had made me waffles and coffee. As I hugged him goodbye, he smiled brightly. "It's going to be okay, Carmen. I promise."

I believe him. I really do.

I rolled down the driveway and into the street. I waved goodbye to my grandfather as I drove past the house.

In Silver Spring, I hugged a sleepy KC in the doorway of her apartment. I then went and picked up Errol. I hugged Amanda goodbye. I told her that I loved her. We got Errol's backpack into Beatrice and the trunk closed. Success.

We got on the road.

We took off across Maryland, starting from her wide eastern side and moving to her narrow western handle. I thought that I'd never been this way before, but I have; I recognized the road, the small, lush mountains. This was the way that we used when we used to go to West Virginia. We passed through the place where the West Virginia bound group would stop for lunch - a section where the highway passed through the mountain. The mountain had been blasted away and the layers of rock were visible where the earth had pushed up and folded upon itself; split open, it was raw and beautiful.

Errol and I talked. We told stories about friends and lovers and family, and commented on the beauty of the places we were passing. We decided on a road trip battle cry - "Towanda!"

It rained and rained. Mist clung to the mottled green mountains. The windshield wipers pulsed. Other drivers sped past us.

We passed through Frostburg, where my father went to college.

"TOWANDA!" we screamed, pumping our fists in the air as West Virginia welcomed us.

Errol murmured a prayer in Arabic. "What was that?" I asked.

"Traveling dua," he said, and then translated it for me.

We stopped at a gas station high in the mountains. We filled up, shivering in the drizzly morning air. I went inside and went to the bathroom, making a note (by which I mean "taking pictures") of the shelves of kitschy statues and clocks and trinkets. I bought a soda. At the counter, a woman with frizzy blond hair said "It's miserable out there."

"Yeah," I agreed. "It's been raining all morning."

"You been driving for a bit?"

"Since six this morning, yeah."

"Where you going?"

I felt a tiny glow inside as I said "California."

"Ooh! Visiting?"

"Moving."

She tilted her head to look past me and saw Beatrice filled to the brim with boxes.

"Wow." She handed me her change. "Good luck with that. I hope the weather improves."

"Thanks."

"Travel safely."

"Thank you."

Somewhere high in the mountains of West Virginia, it began to snow. Not much, or heavily, but fat, white flakes swirled down with the rain. Our ears popped. We talked about religion.

We passed into Pennsylvania. "TOWANDA!"

We passed animals. Dead animals. Roadkill, sprawled out along the side of the road. I counted eight dead deer with their backs broken and bodies folded; rabbits and groundhogs blasted apart by the force of semi tires.

Errol took a nap, and I listed to my road trip mix. We stopped for gas again and switched places. He drove and I made sandwiches in the front seat. The car was warm. I got a phone call from Rebekah.

"I'm standing by the Pacific Ocean! And I thought of you!"

I'm coming, I promised her.

We passed into West Virginia again briefly ("TOWANDA!") before moving into Ohio.

My mom called to ask how the trip was going. "Did anyone lose their pool privileges yet?" she joked, referring to the Wisconsin road trips we went on as a family when I was a child and how my frustrated father would start stripping privileges left and right as we poked each other, screamed, fought, and threw tantrums. Despite the threats, however, when we landed at the hotel on the first night, we always went into the pool anyway. "We had to get you tired for the next day, so you'd sleep in the car," Mom later explained.

"No one's lost their pool privileges," I said, smiling.

Errol drove and I took pictures*. I watched the drivers in the cars that we passed. People argued and talked and sucked away on their Big Gulps.

Indiana.

"TOWANDA!"

Around 5:30, having been on the road for approximately 11 hours, we made our way to Natalie and Michael's house in Bloomington. We had to wait for Natalie to get home, so we chatted with Michael and played with Charlie Rose the dog. After she got home, we went out for beer and burgers and a tour of the Indiana University campus (which is GORGEOUS! And also is where Kinsey did all his research!).

Back at the house, we met up with Sarah Brown! Who is lovely and awesome! We hung out and chatted and I gave her huge hugs to give back to the people in DC.

This post seems a little loopy, but that's cause I'm so darn tired. This was the longest day of the trip, and we passed through five states, and I need to get to bed.

I love you all. Good night, good night.


*pictures forthcoming, just not tonight